Would you date yourself?

Would you date yourself? This is an important question to ask yourself. Check out this to find out why? and what your answer should mean to you.

Think about this very hard and I don’t want you to be shy about answering and I certainly don’t want you to dupe yourself when you answer it. Would you date yourself? Now let’s take a step back for a moment, have a challenge, free to complete before you even answer this question.

The first thing I want you to do is write down what you want in the man that you’re gonna be with. If you are a guy reading this, you can do the same thing for the woman that you wanna be with too. But write down the standards that you have for that person and I don’t just mean talking about their looks or anything like that. I mean talking about your real standards for their behaviour, the way they treat you, the way they are around your friends and family.

Let me give you some examples.

1. What’s your standard for how much effort they put in with your friends? 2. What’s your standard for the way they are in their energy, their politeness, and their generosity when they meet your family? 3. What’s your standard for this person’s level of chivalry? Do they open the door? Do they go out of their way to look after you? Do they pay for you? Do they do things for you? 4. What’s your standard for their level of generosity? 5. What’s your standard for their level of affection? 6. What’s your standard for the amount of time they would give you? 7. What’s your standard for the sacrifices that they would be prepared to make in their life for you? 8. What’s your standard for the extent to which they would grow for you? They would try and learn new things or update the way they think about life? Even change their belief systems to help align them with yours?

What is your standard for all of these things in the person that you want to be with?

You may want to pause this right now. Take out pen and paper and actually write these down. You could fill on sure couple of pages with the way that you would want them to react and get real date with it too.

Ask yourself.

If you screwed up: How would you want them to react to your mistakes? How much attention would you want them to give it? Would you want them to berate you? Would you want them to be kind to you? Would you want them to be understanding?

If they made a mistake if they did something that hurt you: How would you want them to react to it? To what extent would you want to go out of their way not to hurt you?

Write down all of these standards. Now, when you have done this. I want you to take a big long look at this list. Look at everything you’ve written down. Ask yourself this question: To what extent do I live up to each and every one of these standards. If this is my self-standards for the person I want to be with, to what extent do I live up to the standards myself?

Why is this important? Well… for couple of reasons. Firstly, presumably you’ve written down all of these things because you know all of these things go to making up an incredibly attractive mate, someone that you could sustainably see yourself with. Now of course if they would make an incredibly attractive mate, you also now have a bunch of tips and clues into how you can be the most attractive mate to someone else. So this leaves clues, in other words by exposing the gaps between what you are and what you want, you get to see areas of improvement for yourself.

People often ask how can I make myself more attractive? Well… the key way to make yourself more attractive is be more what you wanna see in other people. Be more what you want in a man you want. If you want that standard from someone else, you have to be prepared to live up to that standard yourself, to what extent do you live up to your view of what someone else should be. And when you answer that, you will find out whether you really would want to date yourself.

The reason I think this is such a profound question is because it is sobering, it’s incredibly humbling to realize how far sure of we often follow what we expect from everyone else and it is also very empowering because as I said if you know these things, you know what would like to improve. In fact from looking at these listing standards, I’m sure you have a whole shopping list of things that you would like to improving yourself that would make you more attractive to the opposite sex because the name of the game of course is bringing value to the table.

If you have just written a road map of how to bring value to your relationship, you have just written a road map for how to be the ideal partner for someone else and that’s something we should strive for every single day. Instead of doing what other people do which is go into relationships with this entitled notion of what they deserve, when they themselves can’t even live up to the standard that they have for someone else, which is a crazy despicable concept is the hide of hypocrisy. So going to get value, delivering what you expect from someone else and have the guts to ask the very honest question would I date someone like myself?

By then, you will have an equal, beautiful, happy and healthy relationship. However, please remember do not expect too much in return as it will give quite amount of stress into the existing happy relationship. Things might change in times, so we must always open our heart to accept changes and what it will turn out to be whether it is good or bad.